The SM Detective

I watched this movie several weeks ago so I'm going a bit by memory here, plus what I've picked up from internet research. I'm not trying to be the last word with these reviews, anyway. With at least some of the flicks I've reviewed so far, and will review in the future, you may very well find more detailed reviews elsewhere on the internet.

I'm more interested in reporting on whether or not these movies are worth buying/watching from an SM aficionado's point of view. It shouldn't come as a surprise that not every movie with high production values is worth your money or your time.

My main criterion is the JQ (jerk-off quotient). Is there any scene in this movie that instigates wood? If not, what's left to recommend it? Very little, I'm afraid, if you're simply in the mood for some down 'n' dirty SM action.

That said, I just got through reading a review of the previously mentioned Hana to Hebi (original version). The reviewer found it to be "garbage". This brings up a somewhat problematic issue: Who's the reviewer? Or more specifically, where's the reviewer coming from? I don't think I know any connoisseur of SM movies who would consider the original Hana to Hebi to be anything but a classic and a masterpiece.

But there may be other reasons for this which would render the jerk-off quotient less important. In the first place, any movie with Tani Naomi in it is one that I want to have in my collection. The iconic status of the actress in this case would cause me to ignore the JQ.

All of this at least serves to remind me that I haven't watched Hana to Hebi in ages. Time for another viewing!


Shoujo Shibari Ezu is about a college professor (Keisuke) who, while walking home one evening, comes across a woman who is apparently intent on killing herself by standing in front of an on-coming train. I say apparently because as I remember things, she reaches down for something at the last second and then dashes off the tracks. The professor just stands there, transfixed, as the train roars by, narrowly missing the woman.

The professor takes the woman to his friend's bar. It's a rainy night and there are no other customers in the bar. The bar owner and his female partner are SM perverts, it seems. At one point the woman opens her top revealing her upper body which is bound with red rope.


Eventually, it is decided that taking the mysterious girl to a ramshackle old building for SM training would be a good idea. The professor, too, has quite an interest in SM. One scene shows him presenting a slideshow to his class of sleepy students. Even a slide of the famous Yoshitoshi print known as The Lonely House on Adachi Moor fails to get a rise out of his bored students.

In short, the professor's life seems mundane at best, meaningless at worst. He is married to a rich, cold woman and his father-in-law is a powerful politician. His teenage son is a weasely little prick who rats out his father. More on this later.

Taking the mystery girl to the old building and attempting to train her to be his slave proves to be more difficult than the professor expected but it has at least added some zest to his life.


As is often the case in these movies, the girl gets in touch with her "m" side and starts enjoying her bondage and rough treatment.

Eventually, the professor takes her for a walk outside as a test of her loyalty. They walk right past a koban with a policeman standing outside. There is a tense moment where we do not know if the woman will run screaming to the officer or accept her new life as slave to the professor.

Of course, she chooses the latter and the two end up frolicking in a park.

Unfortunately, the professor's son is peeking out of a restroom window in the same park, perving on a group of schoolgirls who are exercising in their white t-shirts and tight bloomer shorts. After he finishes spanking the monkey, he spies his old man with the girl sitting next to each other on a park bench.

Being a mama's boy, he dutifully reports what he has seen to his mother and all hell breaks loose. Before long, the professor's wife shows up at his seedy little SM love nest and the professor and his bar manager friend are left with no choice but to strip and bind her as well.

Overall, Shoujo Shibari Ezu is a pretty worthwhile flick. The two best parts are pictured here: one scene where one of the female protagonists is hung upside down with her legs spread and the other where the professor cruelly hogties the mystery girl after she attempts to escape.

Three erect cocks out of a possible five.

Update: I have changed the word "Woman" to "Girl" in the English title to this movie.

KabukiJoe